Somatic Experiencing(R) is different from traditional talk therapy so you might be curious about what happens during sessions. Here are a few of the common questions clients new and experienced have asked.
How long will it take for me to feel different?
The speed of change and the way change shows up really depends on your nervous system. A nervous system that has been in ‘freeze’ for a long time is going to take more time to ‘thaw’. The overarching approach of SE is titration, meaning we don’t do too much too fast. This can be frustrating in the beginning (I speak from personal experience!), however after just a couple of sessions it becomes very clear why we don’t go in too fast and stay in those stickier places for too long. As I like to say, you’ll peek over the edge at the pool of lava but I won’t let you jump in and burn to a crisp.
In my experience, huge changes can happen in as little as a few sessions. However, deeper trauma such as developmental trauma is just going to take more time (and patience), as we’re working with a younger nervous system.
So, what exactly happens during a session?
During our first session, I gather some background information about your health and family history, other treatments you’ve tried and your trauma history. My intent is to not re-traumatize with a lot of details but to get a summary of what your nervous system has experienced so when something shows up, I know some of the story behind it and how we can work with it. I also provide a little psychoeducation about SE, and you get to practice what it’s like to feel inside your body. If it’s appropriate and with your consent, I may introduce simple touch work so you can get a sense of the when’s and why’s this would be introduced. We also discuss your goals for our work together.
After we meet for the first time, I develop a treatment plan that I feel will best address your goals. From this, sessions could entail seated work while you practice interoception (feeling inside your body) or pendulation (moving between points of focus in the body), assessment/treatment of your defence orienting systems, movement-based activities, vocalizations, and/or touch work on the table.
You’re going to put your hands/feet/legs on me? Where? When? Why?!
If it is appropriate, I could propose we introduce some element of touch into a session. If this doesn’t feel right for you, you get to say no. (Boundaries are awesome! Expressing them and having them respected is even more awesome!) Touch can be done seated, standing or we may move to the table for other kinds of touch work where you need to be reclined such as when working with the kidneys/adrenals. In addition to the kidneys/adrenals, touch can happen on the joints, arms, legs, pelvis, feet, head, hands, stomach, and/or chest; it really depends on the focus for the session. You are on your back when on the table and for the most part there is no movement with the hands. Bolsters and blankets are available for your comfort.
I introduce touch for various reasons: to repair ruptured relationships with touch, to prime the system to encourage the emergence of deeper self-protective responses, to bring more regulation in the system, and to work with deeper body systems that are ‘stuck’ (i.e., digestion, adhesions and breath). Trauma introduces all kinds of patterns into our nervous system. Part of our work is to recognize those patterns and break them so you can heal and move on with your life.
When will I know I’m getting better?
The shifts I have heard from clients through our work together include:
- Increased capacity for stress;
- Feeling safer in the world and in intimate relationships;
- Not being as ‘jumpy’;
- Feeling more present;
- Being able to express healthy aggression more easily and more often;
- Increased ability to set boundaries;
- Feeling more comfortable with touch;
- Feeling more empowered and strong;
- More easily able to express needs and;
- Having more empathy for those around them and themselves.
In my experience, these changes are permanent. Once your nervous system feels the beauty of space/expansion/relaxation/empowerment, it prefers this way of being.
You keep mentioning regulation; what the heck is that?!